With the threat of kidnap an ever present threat [0.0005%!], escaping this scenario is going to require some imagination and daring.
Enter this article; the 5 crucial methods to escape a locked room with just your trusty Swiss Army Knife. You can thank me later and do keep reading, it’s to die for.
1 – Pick the lock
The obvious approach
This first approach should jump out at you immediately. Using the tweezers, toothpick and one of the smaller knives of the Swiss Army Knife, carefully pick the lock using the information contained in this article. Once the lock is picked, slowly and carefully open the door, making sure there are no guards on the other side. You’re out!
2 – Saw a Hole in the Door
The clever approach
Using your Swiss Army Knife’s corkscrew, drill into the wood in the corner below the door handle. Once you have drilled sufficiently, use your serrated knife to start sawing away at the square of wood around the handle. Once you have sawed a square in the door, shout “Timber!” and simply push the door open and walk away.
Hint: Don’t shout timber too loudly, you don’t want to alert any nearby guards.
Get the Gear!
Now that you are further along in this article, you can see the real need for your own Swiss Army Knife.
3 – Bash down the door
The brute force approach
While this doesn’t require your Swiss Army Knife per se, you can hold it in your hand whilst doing it. The method required to bash open a door involves leaning back on one leg and kicking with as much force as you can muster (using the other leg) at the area just next to where the door handle and lock is (if the door handle is on the left of the door, then the area of door just to the right of it and vice versa). With the door kicked down and your chest sufficiently puffed out, make your escape.
Do not use your shoulder to bash down the door; not only will it not work, you may dislocate said shoulder causing significant pain and reducing your chance of escaping the room.
4 – Get to the higher ground
The “out of the box” approach
You’re sitting in the room at a table in a horribly uncomfortable chair. You want to escape, but your Swiss Army Knife can’t saw through the reinforced tempered steel door that is 12 inches thick. These people really want to keep you in this room.
However, you notice the ceiling above is the same generic office ceiling found in every movie ever. Climb onto the table, push open one of the tiles in the ceiling, and climb in. Crawl into the area of ceiling above the other side of the 12 inch reinforced tempered steel door and using the same approach as before, climb down.
Note: Use the Swiss Army Knife’s toothpick to pick out that bit of steak from lunch before making your escape. Looking good is important.
5 – Wait
The unexpected approach
Lie in wait, preferably next to the door to the room. Sooner or later whoever captured you will enter and either taunt you or give you doughnuts (if this happens, it’s probably an interrogation for your internet habits; get out fast!)
Have your Swiss Army knife’s sharpest blade at the ready, and when they enter, overpower them, running to your freedom, look at this site.
Hint: For maximum results, cut a strip of your shirt off using the scissors on your Swiss Army Knife, and tie it around your forehead. Not only will you instil fear into the hearts of your captors, you’ll look pretty bad-ass.
I did say you could thank me later..
Your certain safety has now been granted by reading this article and you are ready to go out into the world, confident that you can overcome any situation. Just don’t forget to bring your Swiss Army Knife, you never know when you’ll need it.